Friday, October 15, 2010

"Wait till I steal yo man, bitch!"

[If you've watched every episode of Noah's Arc, like I have, you'll know exactly where that qoute surfaced...but this isn't about those type of people (trouble seeking women that is)...]

Where are the songs about “the other woman”? How many times do we hear songs about the deception that a spouse or partner brings into the relationship? Countless times, actually. It always speaks on the devastation/anger/confusion that is felt when someone finds out about the unfaithfulness of the partner. We even hear the opinions and feelings of the person who did the cheating, more and more these days. (see; Trey Songz- "Last time") But how often do we hear about the feelings of the person who is considered the home wrecker?

Yes I’m speaking of the Alicia Keys and the Fantasias out there. As I try to understand the mind-set of the cheat-er and the cheat-ee, I have to also evaluate the third party. The “skank” (as you call her) who knew your man was taken but thought it was alright to plunge into the pool of deception as well.

It’s arguable that Love is the most powerful emotion that one can feel. And because Love supposedly conquers hate, greed, pride and envy, it’s not very surprising that a woman won’t let go of a relationship even if that person is committed to someone else. They say you can’t help who you love, and I guess I agree. A woman who involves herself in a relationship with a taken man can’t really be faulted. Is it really her fault that she fell for someone who appeals to her just like he appealed to his girlfriend/wife? Most times out of 10 those women are clueless of the “not-available” sign that should be hanging from a man’s head. Men are probably the biggest deceivers known to mankind, and are far from honest when they enter the dating stages of a relationship. So even if the "other woman" finds out that he’s tied-up, so to speak, it’s near impossible to switch romantic feelings for him off right away.

Of course it’s strongly advised that the "other woman" take a step back from the cheater. We’ve all heard, “If he cheated on her, he will most likely cheat on you.” But is that always true? Sometimes a man just honest to goodness grows apart from his titled companion. Shit happens. And unfortunately shit happens between two people frequently. Sometimes gents and gals alike find someone who just has more of the same common interests as they do. I’m not talking about sexual interest either! You may have done nothing at all but that chick who he considers to be slightly more ride or die may just come into the picture. She didn’t take your man…ok well she sorta did…but she probably wasn’t thinking, “I can be a better girlfriend” when she did. Not that I’m condoning cheating. Because if it ever gets to that point I would want him to break-up with me before he sneaks around with someone else. But as for the "other woman", why must she be faulted for gaining his interest?

My good-feelings towards the “other woman” do not extend to those who seek taken males and use their “skanky” (there goes that word again) ways to win their hearts (or penises). I’m talking about those honest, good women who really fall in love with hooked-up men. I feel for you. Sometimes you’re the victims. Unable to break those emotional ties. You shouldn’t always be considered home wreckers. Although I’ve never been in that position myself, I really do feel for you…

I'll pray for you all and even pour libations to you “other women”….... *insert pouring liquor on the graves of our ancestors here.*

1 comment:

  1. As far as the "other women" *clears throat* "it bees like that sometimes!"
    hehe but no seriously it is a crime especially whenyour fighting so hard not to even text that person
    1. Theres a "wifey" in the picture person because
    1a. If you become involved you could possibly 1ai. STEAL THEIR MAN which may lead to him doing the same to you in about 6 months
    1aii. become THEE side chick which leads to him never taking you serioulsy.

    Could you hear my vent? Oh the chain reaction in relationships *sigh*