Wednesday, April 20, 2011

I want you to want me to want you.

Ever heard of the "honeymoon period"? I'm not necessarily speaking of marriage. Any stage of a relationship applies. It's the time in a "relationship" or the starting up of one, where everything is peachy. When you realize that the person who you are currently talking to is your idea of perfect. Everything that is going on between the two of you makes it seem like you can't live without each other. Every single quirk, nook and cranny of that individual makes them the moon to your sun. You feel like this is the person that you could spend the rest of your life with. Yep, all is well in paradise...and then you decide to make that commitment to each other and then the "comfortable period" sets in.

The time where you each know (what you think) is everything about that person. You begin to fall into either two categories. You either realize that those quirks you thought were "cute" at the beginning of the relationship aren't very cute anymore. They're more like annoying as hell. Or you fit into the 2nd category where not-so-good information, you should have known about the other person, starts to surface. And with us falling into one of the two (or both) categories we realize that the person who we were so wrapped up in is not who we originally fell for.

So let's go back to that "honeymoon period". It's really a game. Some play it better than others. I for one am pretty sucky at it (which is surprising because I'm usually the queen of games). I'm not good at making myself seem better than what I'm really am. I'll call it my open and honest personality, although some may disagree with me, lol. I think the reason why I fail so much at this dating scene is because I'm never good at creating a "fantasy me". You know what I'm talking about. When you meet someone who you are interested in you either tell/show them that you have the qualities that they are looking for (even when you obviously don't have them) or you lie to fit the mold you think they may want.

Call it being fake if you want. But sometimes it's that harmless smoozing that forces you
into a place where you must be on your best behavior. It's when we smarten ourselves up, for the hopefully successfulness of our relationship.

And to tell you the truth I like it when guys do that. When they are on their best behavior at the start of the relationship. Of course I'm hoping that the best of them carries on throughout the relationship in it's entirety. But I do like the idea that someone is doing the most to impress me.

The idea that you put your not-so-cute habits on the back burner just so you can have the opportunity to be with me is flattering. A guy with a clean act shows me that you care enough to try and make me want to get with you. I don't know why that is. Maybe I'm not that big of a fan of the chase. I guess I don't get off on the hard to get types. I like the easy??? Is that weird, for this time in my life? I know my friends and peers, especially females, are more content when a dude is treating them like they don't exist. I dunno why, but it's an epidemic for females my age.

But of course I'm always on a different page than everyone else. I know the consequences of having someone build up an optimum personality to win me over. More times out of ten, it leads to surprises and heartbreak down the road. But for some reason I don't care. I want you to want me to want you. And if that means you have to put on a tie, gel down the hair and clean under the fingernails to do be it.

Allow the honeymoon to commence.

1 comment:

  1. Wellllllllllls *antwon dodson voice*
    I def. agree with how women like niggas who don't even know they exist. Then it's like if he does show interest "he is too pressed." So thats a never ending debate.

    As far as you thinking you need an alter ego to attract a guy. I don't think so. I think thats where everything goes down hill. After about 3 months the real you comes out and shit goes into shambles. I honestly try to be myself from the jump and if you don't like it. Fuck you. Now yes there should be an element of surprise as you go but not no damn personality change lmao. You are fine the way you are.